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funny response to are you still alive

Im single by choice. (Heres What To Do), Roommate Sleeps in Living Room All The Time! But half the time, it is a nightmare. Maybe their roommate was sick. Im still waiting for my Superman/Wonder Woman. Its a shame you cant Photoshop your personality. So, it might be wise to double-check they're still alive before you complain. Because youre highly qualified. You don't need to say it. Just standing here waiting for stupid questions I guess. Check out: Image credits Photo by Priscilla Du Preez on Unsplash. 6. 75. Sarcastic comebacks come in handy any time someone is behaving in a particularly annoying way. This person is taking so long to reply, you will be waiting for geology to change before you get one. 2023 The Arena Media Brands, LLC and respective content providers on this website. Thats because Im like the last slice of pizza. Yup, I dont share it. 2. As for me, I cant even afford honey! Blogging about a wide range of topics to help facilitate a better future. Trying to understand the meaning of life or the universe at least. Passed into the next room and told me to tell you go fuck yourself. 9. Siri, why am I still single? Some people are going to find your witty responses funny, and some people arent. As geeky as it is, this funny response to I love you has got to make you chuckle. Nasty comebacks dont require a lot of wit; instead, these will land your target flat on their back and wallowing in self pity. Use the opportunity to make a good impression. Often, we text some people when were at rock bottom, to try and get their help, or just have someone to talk to. Well, seeing as you care, how long do you have? Another common excuse that younger people tend to give when they take a long time to reply is Ive been busy with uni. can be tackled in some really interesting ways. Why not laugh about it and allow it to bring us closer together? via: Pexels / George Pak. [Read: 33 very creative insults to intellectually insult someone with your sarcasm]. To read all future answers to your comment, please bookmark this page. - Anonymous. 11. "Alright. If laughter is the best medicine, your face must be curing the world. Before I answer, I let you know that those who know my age get bad luck. 4. If you're going to be two-faced, you could at least make one of them pretty. Hopefully, youll stay there. Your attempt at social interaction to be polite is hereby acknowledged. Here are 55 funny coronavirus memes that will make you LOL. I hear good things; however, you should never listen to rumors. It lets him know that you love spending time together. Yep, thats about it just a confusing answer. Here's a 13-second video explaining how Jennifer Lawrence uses this Surprise Theory: Keep calm and be awesome. Wait, are you my Superman/Wonder Woman? 24. Your question is registered, we will answer when in the mood. 3. parkerbilly 3 yr. ago. Paul Levesque (Triple H), pro wrestler & VP at WWE "It's funny now because I'm kind of in this weird kind of combo twilight zone of the last bits of my in-ring . In fact, theyre taking too much of it. - Anonymous. Your email address will not be published. Thomas Andrew Lehrer (/ l r r /; born April 9, 1928) is an American musician, singer-songwriter, satirist, and mathematician, who later taught mathematics and musical theater.He recorded pithy and humorous songs that became popular in the 1950s and 1960s. I dont go around asking how youre still married, do I? Feeling confident? This is a good response to throw out there. I dont think youre an idiot but whats my opinion compared to countless others? Still, the ghosters ghost on. 2. " Actually, you're mad" is a version of the classic, rhetorically sophisticated comeback "I'm rubber, you're glue." This one is the white-belt level of "who's mad?" martial arts a simple. What do you mean Im still single. Steven Wright (comedian). How much do you charge to deliver an STD? In reality, they are not cool, they are just rude. I am doing a bit better than before, but not nearly as awesome as I am going to be. You just live. "You know I can do this anytime.". I'm alive! Listen, maybe your crush really did lose their phone. And maybe thats the reason why theyre taking so long to reply. but it's just so blunt and funny. 6. (Explained). Looking at my life, half the time I see that I don't live half of what I should! I have found that people in a coma find it very difficult to hold a phone, turn it on, look at their messages, think of a reply, and then type out their reply. Have a nice life." This text is excellent because you are making him or her feel guilty about ghosting you. Single is the new blackif that even makes sense! And if they don't reply to this, you can walk the walk away. [Read: How to be a fun texter and make anyone laugh while reading your texts]. 70. 61. "Any day above ground is a good day. My standards are higher than what Ive seen lately. A romantic relationship would severely impair my crime-fighting order of business. She buried three husbands and two of them were just napping." Things can't get much better and you want the world to know. There is plenty of room. 2. If youre still single, some people will ask you for a reason or explanation, in one way or another. I'm loved! Check out the following infographic for some practical tips to maintain a conversation and take it forward.SaveIllustration: StyleCraze Design Team. Sure, we all have things to do, but when someone takes two days to reply, that is a sign that they are the problem. If you've ever worked in an office, used municipal buildings or lived in a city, chances are, you already know what public notices are bland, dull, usually complaining and rarely funny posters that tell us somewhat useful information about all kinds of things. If its better than yours Ill chalk it up as a win. Your hair looks great! Wondering How You Are 1 I'm Better on the inside than I Look on the outside This one works well when you're still in your pajamas or are having a bad hair day. Are you going to marry me? 29. 5. At the end of the day, if theyre not putting in the effort to let you know theyre not interested, theyre probably not worth your time. Well, Im hoping its going to get a lot better, I cant lie. The 'Sex And The City' Cab Light Theory, Revisited, It's Hot When People Call You By Your Last Name, I Never Feel Older Than When I Try To Make A TikTok, Get Even More From Bustle Sign Up For The Newsletter. 95. You can use variations, such as, "Well enough to chat with you if you wish.". 3. Im in a loving, committed relationship with my bed. You have an old soul. Canva. Someone took their costume way too seriously. You dont need to say it. Get your own life first before you try sharing it. If theyre too busy to text you back, you need to be too busy to continue having them in your life, or on your social media. "Ugh I was so lazy this week. Required fields are marked *. I wrote him a cheque for it, post-dated of course. Chic Murray (comedian), When I die, I hope to go to heaven, whatever the hell that is. Ayn Rand (author), The only difference between death and taxes is that death doesnt get worse every time congress meets. Will Rogers (actor), "My grandmother was a very tough woman. I hate to break it to you, but Im not single. You were a young man when you last spoke. The music billboard charts got it wrong! 39. More like give me a sign that you're still alive. Theyre not replying to you, but theyre posting on Twitter. Whats with all these questions? . For instance, a friend will be amused when you sarcastically reply, Not today, Satan! However, I need to take you back about 12 years to answer that question. Youre a ground-hugger. I dont mind you talking so much, as long as you dont mind me not listening. Alexa's response: No, that's not true. Speak Now Or Forever Hold Your Peace: What Does It Mean? Your hair looks great! But if youre getting fed up with always being asked the same questions, you shouldnt feel bad about giving a funny or witty reply. So, it might be wise to double-check theyre still alive before you complain. Herodotus (historian), "At my age, I do what Mark Twain did. 350 opinions shared on Guy's Behavior topic. Life is up to something. Some of the best, wittiest, and most humorous quotations in the English language are quotations about age, childhood, adolescence, middle age, and old age most of all, about growing old! The answer to this question has become so generic it feels like there is an auto-complete machine in our heads! 8. Oh, a thought crossed your mind? "The trouble with quotes about death is that 99.9% of them are made by people who are still alive." Acting like a prick doesnt make yours grow bigger. What? I never even listen when you tell me them. 81. Norman Wisdom (comedian), "I have lost friends, some by death, others through their sheer inability to cross the street." As anyone who knows anything about human biology will know, when a woman misses her period, that is a sign she is pregnant.if(typeof ez_ad_units!='undefined'){ez_ad_units.push([[320,100],'grammarhow_com-box-3','ezslot_13',105,'0','0'])};__ez_fad_position('div-gpt-ad-grammarhow_com-box-3-0'); Therefore, if she were to rely on your messages for her period, she would be pregnant by now. You know when you go to meet some friends, or friends of your friends, or to a party or whatever, when you meet someone new, at some point people ask you: "SO WHAT DO YOU DO FOR A LIVING?" And what I wanted to do in this thread is list the craziest answers that you can give, you know, shock people or create an extremely awkard moment. Hanging by a thread. Don't Push It Too Far. Virginia Woolf (author), "When I die, I'm leaving my body to science fiction." - Adam Feb 23, 2016 at 17:08 On a scale of 1 to 10, Id say somewhere between 1 and 10. A little bit worse now that youve asked. I'm happy! I am not looking for anyone, and neither is anyone looking for me. Thats because I eat Doritos chips too loudly. We cant always get what we want now, can we? 53. Cant complainI have tried, but no one listens. You grow on peoplebut then again, so does cancer. Search, discover and share your favorite Still Alive GIFs. I Don't Miss, I Kiss A sweet bit of poetry that sounds super romantic. If they take several days to talk to you again, thats a sign that either they dont want to talk to you, or, they were so dirty that its taken them that song to shower. Could Be Payday. So the next time someone asks you why you're still. How are you? could be much more than a basic question, but we tend to stick to the same old, half-hearted responses. 47. I am doing wellor that could be my anti-depressants speaking. Haha basically a sassy way to say, "I'm still alive." 1. Although for some, traveling to your partner might not be an option. Follow for more funny content!! Whoever cast a voodoo spell on my love life can chill now. 90. How do you think that I am doing? Reply. But, whats the likelihood of that happening? Im sorry. What if questions can help you form connections fast, but you don't want to rush or force it. Not everybody may appreciate them. I cant complain, not that anyone listens anyway. At least my hair looks amazing. Sarcastic Captions for Instagram. 2. Reply. alive # dead meat # tremors # kill count # survived # reaction # united states of al # dean norris # unitedstatesofal # you only live once reaction # united states of al # dean norris # unitedstatesofal # you only live once There might be little things that go wrong throughout your life, but at least you're still living it. I bet if you stood on a street corner, youd make some money. IDK, pick your favorite fictional player. Your friends will expect you to say "fine" or "good," so shake things up by providing an unexpected answer. Firing back with something a little funny or witty will make them take notice! Talk is cheapbut then again, so are you. I see youve chosen this time to humiliate yourself in public. Even if life is rough, be happy that you're still alive. I am not sure what you mean. My only talent is not being in a relationship. It's one of the best replies to "How are you?" Hey, I can see straight to the back of your head when I look into your eyes! 3. If ugliness was measured in bricks, I would be the Great Wall of China. Use them as you see fit when someone pokes their nose on your relationship status. WHAT DID THEY SAY?? a fate worse than death." Take Your Time. Her sessions aim to bring about transformation in her clients lives, perspectives, and relationships. Read more about Martin here. If this doesn't get a response, it's sure to get a laugh. I firmly believe that a romantic relationship is a huge distraction. 17. . Do you have a minute? is perfect for lunch-time banter with colleagues. 1. Spiritually? Follow us on Instagram Facebook Twitter Pinterest and we promise, well be your lucky charm to a beautiful love life. You can put your foot in your mouth and your head up your ass at the same time! I dont blame you, Ive had it up to my neck with annoying, repetitive, shallow everyday questions and I often respond with something funny, silly, or sarcastic to make it known. is willie rogers of the soul stirrers still alive; cal berkeley football recruiting questionnaire; american housewife cancelled. And trust us, once you use these lines, everyone will be ooh-ing to your snarky comments the next time someone dares to make fun of you! Well, I have to go to work so Ill try and make the best of it. Its good to see youre not letting education get in the way of your ignorance. I get my daily paper, look at the obituaries page and if Im not there, I carry on as usual." When you show them how you're not affected by them at all, that's when your comedic skills become the best and make others laugh as well. Maybe the reply is just taking a long time to come back. The Arena Media Brands, LLC and respective content providers to this website may receive compensation for some links to products and services on this website. Were already married, remember?! Dave Barry (author). It looks a little too clingy and hard to maintain. Hopefully he'll compliment you right back. I had promised myself I would murder the next person who asked me that question. To answer that question, I need to take you back about 12 years. I dont think youre stupid. He sold it to me on his deathbed.

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